“I’m Busy” is often Nervous System Dysregulation
- Ahīshā Dāsī
- 5 days ago
- 4 min read
How a Celebrated Mask Became the Root of Our Suffering — and the Way Out
Most people don’t think of themselves as dysregulated.
They think of themselves as busy.
Not just busy — responsibly busy. Productively busy. Busy enough to justify exhaustion, distraction, and emotional distance. Busy enough to feel legitimate in a world that quietly rewards speed over presence.
“I’ve just been so busy lately.”
“It’s been non-stop.”
“I don’t even have time to think.”
These aren’t confessions.
They’re social currency.
Busyness has become one of the most celebrated identities of our time. It signals importance, relevance, contribution. It’s rarely questioned — by others, or by ourselves.
And that’s exactly why it’s so powerful.
When “Busy” Stops Being a Schedule and Starts Being a dysregulated Nervous System State
If you slow down for a moment, you might notice something subtle.
“I’m busy” tends to appear right where presence would be required.
When emotions are close to the surface.
When a conversation might get real.
When stillness feels uncomfortable.
When something inside wants attention.
For many people, busyness isn’t a time-management issue.
It’s a nervous system regulation strategy.
Speed becomes control. Activity replaces feeling.Thinking replaces sensing.
And because it looks functional — even admirable — it goes unquestioned.
Pause here for a breath.
Notice what happens in your body as you read that.
The Four Bodies We’re Always Living Through
Every moment of your life, you are operating through four bodies at once:
Mental body — thoughts, plans, narratives, “what’s next”
Emotional body — the underlying feeling tone you carry
Somatic body — breath, posture, tension, movement
Energetic body — the overall quality of your presence
You don’t need to understand this for it to be true.
Other people already feel it.
And when these four bodies are aligned, people feel ease and trust around you. When they’re misaligned, something feels off — even if no one can explain why.
What Misalignment Actually Feels Like
Most of us don’t feel “inauthentic.”We feel busy managing.
You might recognise yourself here:
Mental says: “I’m confident.”
Emotional feels: anxious.
Somatic shows: tight chest, shallow breath.
Energetic reads as: effortful, jittery.
People feel the anxiety, not the confidence.
Mental says: “I want connection.”
Emotional feels: guarded.
Somatic shows: closed posture, minimal movement.
Energetic reads as: withdrawn, unavailable.
People feel distance, even though connection is the intention.
Mental says: “I’m fine.”
Emotional feels: resentment.
Somatic shows: clenched jaw, held breath.
Energetic reads as: dense, charged.
People feel tension — and you feel tired holding it.
Nothing here means you’re doing something wrong.
It simply means the system isn’t aligned.
And busyness keeps this fragmentation in place.
How Busyness Overrides the Body
When we stay busy, something predictable happens:
The mind stays occupied with planning and problem-solving.
The emotional body gets postponed — “I’ll deal with that later.”
The somatic body stays braced, breathing shallowly.
The energetic body stays scattered and outward-facing.
From the outside, it looks like productivity.From the inside, it often feels like low-grade strain.
This is why slowing down can feel uncomfortable — even unsafe.
When activity stops, sensation returns. Emotion surfaces. The body wants to be felt.
So the system chooses motion.
Not because something is wrong.
But because presence hasn’t yet felt safe.
Let your shoulders soften as you read that.
You don’t need to do anything with it.
The Money Layer No One Wants to Look At
There is another force quietly driving the busy loop.
Money.
Or more accurately, fear of not having enough.
Many nervous systems learned early that slowing down could mean falling behind — losing security, relevance, or belonging. So busyness becomes proof of responsibility. Proof you’re doing enough to deserve safety.
“I can’t afford to slow down.”
“I have to keep going.”
“This is just how it is.”
These beliefs don’t live only in the mind.
But here’s the quiet truth most people discover too late:
Money is not generated by nervous systems in chronic survival mode.
Urgency narrows perception.Pressure overrides intuition.Busyness creates motion — not clarity.
People work harder, but often less effectively. They move faster, but in tighter loops.
And because effort is praised more than coherence, this goes unnoticed.
Pause again.
Notice if your breath just changed.
Seeing the Illusion Changes Everything
The way out doesn’t start with changing your life.
It starts with seeing something honestly.
Busy is not a permanent condition.
Busy is a state.
Instead of “I’m just busy,” there’s a gentler noticing:
“My system doesn’t feel settled right now.”
That one shift restores agency.
No blame.
No fixing.
Just truth.
And truth has a regulating effect all on its own.
How to Interrupt the Busy Loop in Real Time
This doesn’t require less responsibility or more free time.
It happens inside meetings, conversations, and ordinary moments.
Right now, as you’re reading, you can try this:
Mental body: Notice if you’re trying to manage how this lands. Let that effort go.
Emotional body: Ask quietly, “What am I actually feeling right now?”Let it be there without commentary.
Somatic body: Notice your breath, jaw, or shoulders.Don’t correct — allow.
Energetic body: Sense the quality of your presence now.Is there a little more space?
That’s regulation.
Not control.
Not collapse.
Just alignment.
The Truth Beneath the Mask
Busyness isn’t the opposite of regulation.
It’s often what dysregulation looks like when it’s socially rewarded.
When this is seen, self-judgment softens. Listening returns. The system begins to settle — sometimes right in the middle of life.
And from that settling, something else becomes possible:
Clearer decisions.
More precise action.
Less effort, more impact.
Not because you’re doing less — but because you’re no longer fighting yourself.
A Line Worth Sitting With
If there’s one sentence to let land, let it be this:
“If I’m always busy, I never have to feel how I actually am.”
Feel what happens in your body when you read that.
That softening — or resistance — is the doorway.
And the moment you stop running from it, stop allowing your nervous system to be dysregulated the way out is already here.
If this resonated and you’d like to explore further, you can find more of my work here:
YouTube: reflections and lived practices
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